Hi, my name is Melissa and I am a member of Infrequent-Bloggers-Anonymous.

That’s right, my name has been conspicuously missing from your Google Reader listing this month, and while I’d love to claim that I was actually doing you a favor this holiday season and staying out of your hair, the truth is that I have been busy learning some very important lessons. Lessons (I think) would be beneficial to share.

Lesson #1: While it is muy-muy important to back up your images, it is also muy-muy important to back up the OTHER information on your computer. Because one day, when your hard drive dies after only 10 months, you will spend countless hours recreating custom Photoshop actions, bookmark links and redoing all your computer settings that made life so easy before crash. And it will always happen at the worst possible time during the busiest time of the year. And you will start rocking back-and-forth in the fetal position, praying for strength when you encounter yet another thing that you didn’t back up. Just saying.

Lesson #2: If your gas or electric company offers a household service plan that covers furnace/water heaters/washer-dryers? Purchase that bad boy this minute. Sure, there is a possibility that you will never need or use this service plan but if by chance the temperature control on your water heater goes out on a Monday and the average temperature outside is a very brisk 20 degrees and all you want is a hot shower because taking a non-hot water shower from water pipes that are coming from a 20 degree outside temperature is NOT AN OPTION – trust me on this one – you will be glad you have the service plan. Even if it takes 5 days and 2 part delivery attempts… It. Was. Free.

Lesson #3:  Make besties with your neighbors. This is important when your water heater is out. They have hot water; you do not.

Lesson #4: Learn to feel blessed through the stress. Eleven photo sessions in 20 days is draining, but without my amazing clients I would be nowhere. And for that I am grateful.

Lesson #5: It truly is better to give than to receive. A post on this later.

I have so much to share with you and can’t wait to do so but first I’m taking a week off to love on my (very neglected) family. I wish you the very Merriest Christmas.

i’m yours,
melissa

my portfolio | email me

matt: When are we coming home from xmas with your parents?
me: January 3rd, why?
matt: Parents are coming to Minneapolis.
me: Your parents?
matt: Yes.
matt: By the way, that was a here’s your sign moment.
me: Boo.

I thought this needed to be posted somewhere for posterity sake.

(from Allison & Vinny’s FAB Lifestyle session)

i’m yours,
melissa

my portfolio | email me

Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by the amazing blessings that God has bestowed on my life this year; my family, my friends, my clients, my clients who have become my friends, the readers of this blog but most of all my supportive husband without whom I would have lost my mind somewhere in the middle.

I am so incredibly thankful to all of you for allowing me to play a part in your lives. Each of you inspire me to be more, push more and to sometimes stop and smell the roses.

Happy Thanksgiving.

i’m yours,
melissa

my portfolio | email me

I am one of the first to admit my propensity for allowing life to swallow me up in its busyness. It’s an awfulnogoodterriblebad habit that over the years has been a safety blanket that feels like silk and warms like a fire. Not only do I actually LIKE it but it’s my my internal computer’s version of safe-mode; it’s not overly functional and definitely minimal fun and minimal “me” but it will do the job and will do it without fail.

As I was driving home on Sunday from an emotion-filled engagement session I glance out the passenger side window and like a much needed kick-in-the-busy-pants, there it was… that crayon box sunset that never fails to grab my attention and make me exhale slowly. God had given me that sunset on a day where I was particularly susceptible to the gentle reminder that if I don’t slow down every once in a while life is going to speed on by and I am going to MISS it. (He’s a sneaky one, that Jesus…) Sometimes I think that life will always be there but the reality is that there are memories, moments and even days that I will never be able to recover. Memories that I missed for what? That elusive check box on the to-do list?

Now if you will excuse me, I am off to go cuddle with my husband and dog. Take THAT check box.

(Yes, I took this from a moving car. Don’t judge me.)

i’m yours,
melissa

My only sibling turned 20 last week. I never thought his advance in age would ever make me feel older – after all, we’ve been 6 years and 17 days apart ever since the day he was born but for some reason, this birthday hit me with a bit of nostalgia.

We didn’t always get along. I mean, we fought. A lot. So much so that my mom used to make us stop and hug each other but the minute she was out of earshot or eyeshot, we would continue fighting. It hasn’t been until the last few years that we really became more than just brother and sister. We became close friends by choice.

When my birthday rolled around this year, he sent me a little gift and inside was the best part of the present; the card:

Oh yes, he is the best brother there ever was.

i’m yours,
melissa

Um. YEAH. You know that fan page I created three days ago? What happened to that you ask? Oh, I forgot about it. Melissa Oholendt has now become example 1-10 of what not to do in marketing your business.

I’ll be honest, I feel a little awkward asking my friends to be my fan. And yes, I’m still cringing at the word FAN. (Fan, fan, fan, faaaaaaaaaaan. I need to get over it.) I would much rather be friends with someone than have a fan but the fact of the matter is that having fanatics seems to inspire more fanatics who then go out and create more fanatics. It’s this wonderful thing they call word-of-mouth advertising and for photographers that is the air we breathe. Selfishly, I love it when my clients put their sessions on Facebook because it makes me happy and proud that my clients love their images enough to allow the world – via Facebook – to see what we have created together. (And I’m a comment whore.) Facebook has become an animal of it’s own when it comes to marketing and I would be naive and frankly dumb-and-lame to not use it to my full advantage.

A very (very) wise woman once asked me, “How can you expect your friends to pimp you out when you won’t even pimp yourself out?” WhatEVER wise woman; fine, I concede. You are right. (As usual.) I am working on it. I am working on being my biggest and loudest fan. I even fan’d myself. Is that wrong?

So, Internet? I rock and you should hire me because guess what? You’re gonna love me.

(PS – to the 29 people who have joined the fan club without any prompting…I am so humbled. I could kiss every single one of you right now.)

i’m yours (and a fan),
melissa

A couple months ago someone asked me when I was going to create a Facebook Fan Page for myself. I laughed and blushed and said, “never”. I didn’t see the point and it felt a little gauche to create my own fan page.

Well…consider this my plate of crow; I am eating my words. (This girl did a little research and was enlightened on the marketing benefits associated with a fan page.)

Pretty please become a fan. I’ll love you forever. (And be my friend too!)

I can’t cook. There – I said it.

I really can’t. I’m not being modest; I legitimately cannot cook. Under supervision, I can chop and slice and dice with the best mediocre of them (and I make a mean pot of rice in the rice cooker) but on my own it invariably turns into a disaster. I think at this point, with so many unsuccessful attempts under my apron, I have developed a very acute mental block against the very idea of cooking and it’s disappointing because both my mom and my mother-in-law are wonderful cooks capable of whipping up a meal like it’s nobody’s business.

Me? HA, yeah right. My specialties are peanut butter & jelly and Rice-A-Roni. (I eat a lot of rice, ok?)

I think that is part of why the show Top Chef intrigues me so much. It’s all so beautiful and watching them throw together a meal with 3 ingredients only (because that is what they rolled on the craps table, naturally) for a half-second makes me believe that I can do/make the same.  And yes, I can hear my husband laughing from the other room. In case you were wondering.

i’m yours (and will be more yours should you invite me over for dinner),
melissa

I went through a nasty break-up this week. After nearly 4 years, I parted ways with Blogger. I will always think fondly of him but my heart belongs to someone else now.

Hello lover.

i’m yours,
melissa

Two hours before my first photo shoot I sat on my bed, holding my phone, and debated the consequences of calling the whole thing off.

My heart was screaming “WHAT IF YOU AREN’T GOOD ENOUGH” while my head calmly replied, “You’ll never know unless you try.” Visually, it very much felt like an episode of American Gladiators. I was wearing one of those terrible head masks holding a giant padded Q-tip trying to knock Fear (in his silver leotard) off the pedestal.

I wish I could say that was the only time I faced Fear on that platform but everytime I feel I have gotten over the biggest hurdle to date, up pops another one mid-run and I fall flat on my face.

Last month I attended a one-day seminar where Dane Sanders was the speaker. Reading his book, Fast Track Photographer, before I started my business was the single best decision I have made. Dane’s book helped me lay foundations for what I hope will become something truly special and also made me view my fledgling business in an entirely different light. One where my business is about the pictures I create, yes, but moreso where my business was centered on something that no one else could offer. Me.

Melding my passion for photography and my quirky personality should not have been difficult. It was inside me already; all I needed to do was put it (myself) out there. But what I found is that I was arriving at client sessions so concentrated on getting what constituted “good” shots that I was forgetting to be myself.

My personality, who I am as a person, was being stifled by the Fear of not being good enough.

The day of Dane’s seminar, I arrived feeling so frustrated and so highly aware of how I was sabotaging myself and my business so when he handed me a microscope and asked me to examine my business top-to-bottom, I panicked. It was if he had decided to give a 7-hour seminar on “How to Strengthen Melissa Oholendt Photography” and I was the main song and dance. But the end, I was hopeful; I was encouraged but I was also so raw it hurt.

Post-seminar, I slid Dane’s book across the table for him to sign and he put his hand over my mine and said, “We need to hear your voice, Melissa.” Before I could formulate a response, I was crying so hard I couldn’t see straight. (Oh Dane, I’m so sorry.) I don’t know how he knew but he KNEW and he was willing to call me out on this self-imposed failure that I couldn’t find words to vocalize.

I still stumble in the battle with fear. Every time I sit down to write a blog post, ol’ man Fear jumps in and whispers, “They don’t care who you are; they only care what you do.” and there I stand with that giant padded Q-tip again.

I give you a post 3 months in the making…take that fear. That’s right, I’ve downgraded you to a lowercase; you will not control me anymore.

In the spirit of my new hi-it’s-me posts, the images below are from a film roll (i love you) I took last summer in DC. That was the moment I knew that not being a photographer would truly break my heart.

i’m yours,
melissa