Um. YEAH. You know that fan page I created three days ago? What happened to that you ask? Oh, I forgot about it. Melissa Oholendt has now become example 1-10 of what not to do in marketing your business.

I’ll be honest, I feel a little awkward asking my friends to be my fan. And yes, I’m still cringing at the word FAN. (Fan, fan, fan, faaaaaaaaaaan. I need to get over it.) I would much rather be friends with someone than have a fan but the fact of the matter is that having fanatics seems to inspire more fanatics who then go out and create more fanatics. It’s this wonderful thing they call word-of-mouth advertising and for photographers that is the air we breathe. Selfishly, I love it when my clients put their sessions on Facebook because it makes me happy and proud that my clients love their images enough to allow the world – via Facebook – to see what we have created together. (And I’m a comment whore.) Facebook has become an animal of it’s own when it comes to marketing and I would be naive and frankly dumb-and-lame to not use it to my full advantage.

A very (very) wise woman once asked me, “How can you expect your friends to pimp you out when you won’t even pimp yourself out?” WhatEVER wise woman; fine, I concede. You are right. (As usual.) I am working on it. I am working on being my biggest and loudest fan. I even fan’d myself. Is that wrong?

So, Internet? I rock and you should hire me because guess what? You’re gonna love me.

(PS – to the 29 people who have joined the fan club without any prompting…I am so humbled. I could kiss every single one of you right now.)

A couple months ago someone asked me when I was going to create a Facebook Fan Page for myself. I laughed and blushed and said, “never”. I didn’t see the point and it felt a little gauche to create my own fan page.

Well…consider this my plate of crow; I am eating my words. (This girl did a little research and was enlightened on the marketing benefits associated with a fan page.)

Pretty please become a fan. I’ll love you forever. (And be my friend too!)

I can’t cook. There – I said it.

I really can’t. I’m not being modest; I legitimately cannot cook. Under supervision, I can chop and slice and dice with the best mediocre of them (and I make a mean pot of rice in the rice cooker) but on my own it invariably turns into a disaster. I think at this point, with so many unsuccessful attempts under my apron, I have developed a very acute mental block against the very idea of cooking and it’s disappointing because both my mom and my mother-in-law are wonderful cooks capable of whipping up a meal like it’s nobody’s business.

Me? HA, yeah right. My specialties are peanut butter & jelly and Rice-A-Roni. (I eat a lot of rice, ok?)

I think that is part of why the show Top Chef intrigues me so much. It’s all so beautiful and watching them throw together a meal with 3 ingredients only (because that is what they rolled on the craps table, naturally) for a half-second makes me believe that I can do/make the same.  And yes, I can hear my husband laughing from the other room. In case you were wondering.

I went through a nasty break-up this week. After nearly 4 years, I parted ways with Blogger. I will always think fondly of him but my heart belongs to someone else now.

Hello lover.

Two hours before my first photo shoot I sat on my bed, holding my phone, and debated the consequences of calling the whole thing off.

My heart was screaming “WHAT IF YOU AREN’T GOOD ENOUGH” while my head calmly replied, “You’ll never know unless you try.” Visually, it very much felt like an episode of American Gladiators. I was wearing one of those terrible head masks holding a giant padded Q-tip trying to knock Fear (in his silver leotard) off the pedestal.

I wish I could say that was the only time I faced Fear on that platform but everytime I feel I have gotten over the biggest hurdle to date, up pops another one mid-run and I fall flat on my face.

Last month I attended a one-day seminar where Dane Sanders was the speaker. Reading his book, Fast Track Photographer, before I started my business was the single best decision I have made. Dane’s book helped me lay foundations for what I hope will become something truly special and also made me view my fledgling business in an entirely different light. One where my business is about the pictures I create, yes, but moreso where my business was centered on something that no one else could offer. Me.

Melding my passion for photography and my quirky personality should not have been difficult. It was inside me already; all I needed to do was put it (myself) out there. But what I found is that I was arriving at client sessions so concentrated on getting what constituted “good” shots that I was forgetting to be myself.

My personality, who I am as a person, was being stifled by the Fear of not being good enough.

The day of Dane’s seminar, I arrived feeling so frustrated and so highly aware of how I was sabotaging myself and my business so when he handed me a microscope and asked me to examine my business top-to-bottom, I panicked. It was if he had decided to give a 7-hour seminar on “How to Strengthen Melissa Oholendt Photography” and I was the main song and dance. But the end, I was hopeful; I was encouraged but I was also so raw it hurt.

Post-seminar, I slid Dane’s book across the table for him to sign and he put his hand over my mine and said, “We need to hear your voice, Melissa.” Before I could formulate a response, I was crying so hard I couldn’t see straight. (Oh Dane, I’m so sorry.) I don’t know how he knew but he KNEW and he was willing to call me out on this self-imposed failure that I couldn’t find words to vocalize.

I still stumble in the battle with fear. Every time I sit down to write a blog post, ol’ man Fear jumps in and whispers, “They don’t care who you are; they only care what you do.” and there I stand with that giant padded Q-tip again.

I give you a post 3 months in the making…take that fear. That’s right, I’ve downgraded you to a lowercase; you will not control me anymore.

In the spirit of my new hi-it’s-me posts, the images below are from a film roll (i love you) I took last summer in DC. That was the moment I knew that not being a photographer would truly break my heart.

My love.

Happy Anniversary.

Internet! Let me tell you how glorious this day was for Matt and I.

Today was the first day in three years that our schedules were not dominated by law school, graduation or the Minnesota State Bar. Let me repeat that. THREE YEARS, friends.

I don’t even remember our life before but I am pretty sure it involved unicorns and rainbows so I’m pretty stoked to return to that. I’m also certain that I am the most proud wife on the planet tonight.

My husband is a rock star.

I’m pretty sure you guys aren’t aware of how awesome my husband is.

He cooks. (Way more than I do.)
He’s crazy smart. (And about to rock the Minnesota State Bar.)
He’s the most handsome man in the world. (For reals.)

AND…

Today he turns 27; which I happen to think is a very classy and distinguished number.

I have a deep obsession with love.

It all started the summer before my senior year in high school when I realized I loved Matt Oholendt. He was one of my closest friends and he was moving away and I was devastated. I watched his parent’s car pull away from their house that early morning and I remember it hurt so badly I felt like my heart was being ripped from my chest. That was the day I realized that I loved him; not just a best-friend-love but I loved him. Heart and soul.

Three years later, and a lot of denial in the middle, we kissed. Two years after that we said our vows.

And today, almost 4 years after our wedding day, we are happier today than we were then.

This is my love story. I would be honored to tell yours.